“Alec Baldwin was back as Donald Trump on “Saturday Night Live’s” opening with plans to skip out with $5 million, his passport and a “bucket of chicken” (about to be fetched for him by Kate McKinnon’s Kellyanne Conway).

But cold, ghostly reality intrudes with “partner” Michael Flynn (Mikey Day) in chains, the ghost of “witnesses flipped.” Trump, like Scrooge in “A Christmas Carol,” wonders what he has to atone for: Calling Mexicans rapists? Draft dodging? The birther stuff? Pocahontas? Making fun of the handicapped reporter? So much to choose from.

Then he has to face his demons. There’s the ghost of Christmas past, Billy Bush (Alex Moffatt), who complains he was fired for that “Access Hollywood” tape, Russian President Vladimir Putin (Beck Bennett) who “sees everything,” and … Trump’s ghoulish future, Hillary Clinton (McKinnon again).

Hillary gloats about the “sexual gratification” she’s getting “watching your slow demise. You have no idea how long I’ve waited to say this: ’Lock him up!”

Trump’s solution? Erase episodes of “The Apprentice” and “fire Robert Mueller.”

We need a good laugh after the Senate passed its tax rewrite yesterday.

Tony